


Hot Cocoa and Cinnamon

by ABeautifulBreakdown



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alpha Ben Solo, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Ben Solo loves eating pussy, Ben smells like chocolate, Childhood Friends, F/M, Forgot My Emergency Blockers in My Office, Found Child, He was a beta, Lawyer Ben Solo, Lost Child, Mating Cycles/In Heat, No Pregnancy, Omega Rey (Star Wars), Oral Sex, Praise Kink, Pregnancy Kink, Rey was married before, Sex, Sexy Times, Single mom Rey, Waitress Rey (Star Wars), Wandered away, When your kid finds your mate, he died, it's sad, just talk about 'putting a baby' in her, maybe? - Freeform, she probably wouldn't mind though, whoops I triggered your heat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-13
Updated: 2020-06-13
Packaged: 2021-03-03 23:49:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 15,853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24674140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ABeautifulBreakdown/pseuds/ABeautifulBreakdown
Summary: When a trip the the park leads to her child wandering off Rey is left in a state of panic. Distraught and over run with emotions she hunts down her little boy only to find him standing with a strange man who upon closer inspection doesn't actually seem so strange.IE When your child finds your mate
Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Original Male Character(s)
Comments: 24
Kudos: 474





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the result of a group conversation started about the biology behind an Omega's heat which evolved into "If Omega Rey had a kid who went missing she would go feral, imagine" and then ball rolled... this is my take on that concept.   
> Because I cannot for the life of my write anything short it ended up being two parts. Because it was written quickly there are plot holes galore so please ignore those haha   
> CW in the endnotes just in case

Her feet ache, her head feels like someone has managed to bash it several times with a wooden mallet and she’s pretty sure she still smells like greasy day-old fries. But, this is the first nice day she’s had off in what feels like weeks so the last thing Rey was going to do was squander it. That is exactly how Rey has found herself trying to secure her squirming three-year-old into his car seat, still back facing thank you very much, of her old beat-up Jetta. A diesel because she can do some of the work herself. The framework may be a bit rusty, the front window may have a chip in it but it’s solid and it’s reliable and it’s hers. 

Well… her's a Rian’s of course. Though at this point the fidgeting toddlers only real concern in life is whether or not he is in fact getting to go to the park. 

“Pway, Pway, Pway!” he chants, swinging his little fists around gleefully as Rey tugs at the car seats harness straps. She’s never really understood the guidelines. Forward-facing only when… forty inches, forty pounds, able to fry a steak on their own and do their taxes. It seems strange watching his little legs sit at such a strange angle. It doesn’t look comfortable but the only person she can think to ask is old Maz and she knows the answer she’s going to get if she brings up car seats with Maz again. 

_ “Kids weren’t in car seats at three when my kids were young!”  _

She says it like its unheard of, this concept of keeping children safe. Still, whenever Maz plunks Rian down in the back of her old station wagon he’s always sitting comfortably in his large plush car seat facing the back just like Rey had instructed. 

“Momma Pway,” Rian chirps happily grabbing at the few wisps of hair that hang down around her chin. His little fingers still sticky with the apple sauce she missed after he’s had his lunch snack. 

He’s always been a rather happy kid, bright blue eyes that shine like crystalline pools. His father's eyes not her muddy brown, the colour of dull swamp water. His cheeks round and cherubic, always just a little pink, his nose small and button-like with a wide and bright smile that she knows for a fact she can lay claim to. Children are funny in that way, their DNA splicing pieces of different people in order to create a whole new being. Equal parts Rey and Owen, just the right amount of each to make the most perfect creature she’s ever laid eyes on. 

Rian has her temper and sense of adventure mixed in with Owen’s laugh and need to always make people smile. Bits and pieces of a man whom Rian barely knew that glitter upon the surface like rays of sunlight reflected in the water. 

As the only person left to draw the comparisons Rey finds herself struggling sometimes to keep the memories fresh in her mind. The way Owen liked his toast, how he would sing in the shower despite being horribly off-tune. How he loved and laughed and smiled with every part of his body. Rian is like that too, unbridled joy wrapped up in the small package of a child who has never truly known heartbreak. 

Sliding into the driver seat Rey adjusts her mirrors and turns the keys in the ignition. The old diesel rumbles to life in a loud ‘ _putt-putt_ ’ grumble that she can't help but be grateful for. Ole Maybell has been struggling for years now and every time Rey thinks that her trusty little car has seen it’s last day she rallies around or Rey manages to scrimp together the money to fix her up. 

“Ready buddy?” She calls to the little boy in the back now carelessly shaking around BeeBee, his stuffed dog. The one that Owen gave him before he was deployed years ago. His last trip he had promised, one more and then he was done.

The irony there will never be lost on her. 

One last tour, just one and they would all be together. Owen was older then her, he was in the military when they met. This scrappy young beta who wandered into the bar Rey had been working at with a pair of his service buddies. He was sweet, warm and funny, hanging around the bar while his friends played pool and joked around about what Rey could never really remember. Owen was different, he asked her about herself and didn’t comment on her designation the way some people did when they came in. Omega’s weren’t usually allowed to tend bar after all but Rey was pretty confident in her ability to hold her own and Chewie, the guy who ran the place always had her back. 

She couldn’t work at the bar anymore, not after Rian was born. The hours were too unreliable and although money had been tight Own had pleaded with her to at least try the stay at home mom thing for a while. Reluctantly she had agreed and spent her days playing peekaboo and struggling with whether or not they should switch to cloth diapers or keep using the disposable ones. Reduce their carbon footprint and all. The little things that being a parent made you want to do. 

The day, Thursday is bright and fresh as they drive with the windows down. Maybell doesn’t have a cd player so Rey puts on the radio and finds the classic rock station humming along as her fingers drum against the steering wheel carelessly. Rian in the back laughs and whoops along to the ‘ _ouu ouuu_ ’ of the Rolling Stones Sympathy for the Devil as Rey takes the next left onto Dunbrack.  


They don’t get to do this often, go to the park that is. She works long hours and by the time she gets home, it’s usually time for a bath or a story before bedtime snuggles and sleep. It’s not long after Rian is out that Rey often succumbs to exhaustion herself, rising early the next day in order to milk every last ounce out of her mornings with her boy. Maz usually arrives closer to eight AM ready for breakfast clean up and cartoons so that Rey can get ready for work and out the door on time. Work, being her job as a waitress at the small dinner down the road. The one that has the best coffee in the area and homemade pies made by Rey when she has the time. Her boss is a kind young man by the name of Poe. He inherited the place from his parents when they passed away and although he has no idea what he’s doing he’s a kind man, always smiling. 

She’s never really met an alpha like him before, one that doesn’t push his weight around or leer at his younger employees like they owe him something. Poe’s actually the closest thing Rey has to a friend outside of old Maz and the hermit who lives in the apartment below them. 

Pulling into the parking lot it is evident that this is exactly what she and Rian should be doing with their day. Kids laughing, dogs barking, the sound of bike tires and rushing water… it’s pure bliss. The joys sound of a world at peace. 

After finding a parking spot further into the park itself. A large spanning acreage donated to the town by a pair of wealthy landowners upon their passing under the strictest instruction to keep the land pure. It’s a small valley carved between two large hills lined with green as far as the eye can see. Paths wind up into the trees and disappear like veins in the earth as a cool brook bubbles flowing down from a water source hidden up high. She’s never seen it first hand, where the cool water comes from. A reservoir maybe or a lake fed by the mountains at their back. It’s hard to hike trails with a toddler in tow so Rey’s adventures usually keep her at the mouth of the park where the brightly coloured play equipment sits well cared for and easily accessible. 

Sometimes she and Rian will wander up the main path, the one with the low incline until they make their way to the wishing well so that Rian can throw pebbles in and listen to them bounce against the stone as they fall. Sometimes they go hunting for trolls, peeking under the wooden bridges and walking through shallow water in their rubber boots. Rian loves to splash and giggle as he calls out to the beasts like he’s calling to a friend, inviting them over for tea and cookies. 

“Twoll momma twoll!” His little voice calls as she unbuckles his restraints and pulls him from the car. He’s stomping his feet like a giant grumbling as he goes, his arms thrown wide for balance. 

Rey laughs as she reaches in to grab their backpack the one she filled with bear paws and goldfish crackers, bottles of water and a Tupperware container full of cut-up apple and cucumber. She's also packed a change of clothes for both of them and a spare diaper just in case. Potty training has been a nightmare thus far but she’s determined not to push him. Everything she’s ready and everyone she’s spoken with all say the same thing. It will happen when he’s ready and for the most part, he's good but when overstimulated he can sometimes forget that his body needs to pee. 

It’s then that she smells it, pulling back out of Maybell's back seat to brush the crumbs from her soft interior. Something strangely familiar that lingers on her tongue like honey, spreading itself out until it’s coating the inside of her nose and mouth with a scent so surreal she can taste it. Something sweet but faintly spicy like how she’s always loved her hot chocolate. Warm and sweet with the slightest nip of something more. 

Owen never liked hot chocolate so they didn’t have it often and now it seems more a luxury when money could be better spent on things they actually needed. Still, it’s there, the flicker of something like a memory only deeper, something visceral that rumbles awake within her veins for the first time in what feels like forever. An itch that can’t be reached, the tune of a song you hear from far away, the one you can’t pick out the words to but the melody is there grating against your nerves. The name on the tip of your tongue that hangs just there beyond your reach. Hot cocoa with cinnamon making her wet her lips in order to catch it just so. 

Funny, all it takes is a second. One second of time and the world can be thrown on its axis. One moment, a breathe, a heartbeat and your world has changed forever. A knock on the door while you’re singing your child to sleep. One minute you’re happily married, you're in love, the next you’re left to raise a child on your own in a world that doesn’t make sense anymore. One minute you’re a normal girl, you could be anything, anyone, an astronaut, a teacher, a firefighter, a chemist and the next you’re body aches, and your mind tells you that nothing will ever be good enough again without the help aid or your alpha to make it so. One minute and you’re at the park with your child getting ready for an afternoon of adventure and fun when a scent hits you like a wave and the next thing you know your child is gone and you’re terrified…

A moment, one, a breath, a heartbeat…

When they came to tell her that Owen wouldn’t be coming home she had cried. Her chest felt heavy, her mind reeled and everything in the world went quiet. This was nothing like that. 

There’s no deafening quiet but the high definition sound of a world that’s too loud. She can hear everything in undistorted detail. The crisp sound of a world living and bright. It spins around her like a carnival ride. The one her foster brother took her on fifteen times because she’d asked him to. It’s like experiencing sound as taste and images as sound. None of it makes sense because she can’t smell him. He’s lost in a myriad of scents all wrapped up in that warm chocolatey aroma that has starting to make her dizzy. 

She calls his name, but there’s nothing. Not a giggle or a squeal, like he’s vanished from thin air. Panic, pure unadulterated panic seeps into her bones filling her with the intense need to run. She pivots on the spot, turning wildly trying to catch a glimpse of dark hair and shoes that light up when he walks. She catalogues carefully what he was wearing as she frantically calls his name again and again leaving the backpack by the wheel of the car, the door still open wide. Nothing matters.

Nothing. 

“Rian!” She hollers it now, her voice cracking, edged with terror as she trails behind cars peeking in between them as she goes looking for the flicker of Rian’s light-up sneakers. Shoes are the last thing a kidnapper will change on a child. They take too long, look for the feet, _look for the feet._

Where could he be? Where would he go? He’s usually so good to stick close to her. She hadn’t asked him to take her hand, could that be the issue? Normally he has two of her fingers enclosed in his dirty fist as he swings her arm too and fro like a skipping rope. This time he’d been stomping on an invisible village laughing as he growled gleefully. 

She should have made him hold her hand.

A nearby couple approach, their eyes wide, the husband's nostrils flaring as they start to speak to her, at her. Their lips move, the wife looks concerned while the husband looks a mix of shock and agitation. An alpha by the way he’s causally holding his breath. He’s obviously picked up on the peaked distress in her scent. 

The woman tries to get closer, her hand raised in placation as Rey wheels away from her, eyes wide and bright. All she knows is that she cannot let this stranger touch her, she cannot alter her scent anymore than the fear and anxiety already have. Rian needs to be able to find her, he won’t be able to find her if she has some other omega’s scent all over her clothes. Instead, she pulls away, calls his name again, over and over and over as she darts along the low metal fencing that edges along the play structure.

The sound of children laughing and playing rattles in her head as she listens for that one distinct voice, that one little laugh. 

Bluejacket with sharks on it, black pants, light-up sneakers. She repeats it in her mind like a mantra. A reminder of the clothing he picked out for himself before they left. BeeBee was gone too, the stuffed dog would be in his hand. Rian never ventured far from his stuffed companion. Maybe Rey can pick up on BeeBee instead. She shifts her focus to the deep scent of sleep and mud and sunshine and rain. Like a summer shower, the kind that Rian likes to play in. He smells like life, like everything in the world but all she can scent is this strange chocolate smell, the spiced cinnamon tickling her nose. 

Rey stops, shaking her head, her mind still spinning, eyes still moving. She’s never felt so many things happening in her body at once. Her limbs feel numb, eyes searching the crowd. Two short sniffs followed by one long one and she catches it. It’s there beneath the sweet-bitter layer, the smell of rain and earth and _Rian_. 

Without another thought to the matter she darts. She can’t remember the last time she’s moved so fast, high school track maybe or when her foster brother Cassian stole her diary when she was fourteen. The one that she had written in explicit detail no less how she felt about one of Cassians friend, a tall dark-headed boy named Ben Solo. 

Like tripping over her own feet her brain snags on the name, a shirt caught on a nail, a gentle tugging, a reminder. The boy who used to play soccer with Cassian or come over and play video games in the basement. He’d smile and laugh at her when she crouched on the steps pretending to read her Harry Potter books when really all she wanted to do was look at him. 

He had smelt so good to her and she never quite understood the why or the how of it. Then she presented as an Omega and suddenly Ben wasn’t Ben to her anymore. His smiles were more guarded and he didn’t pull her in for hugs the way he used to…

Why was she thinking about Ben Solo? 

Reaching the end of the parking lot Rey stops, her legs protesting the movement as she sniffs at the air once more. The scent is stronger here, the street opening into a wide intersection. To the left is the business district, tall office buildings and metal structures that tower over the streets like giant monoliths. To the right is the elementary school Rian will be attending in another year or two. _Rian_ who she needs to find and needs to find now. 

Her heartbeat hammers in her ears, the smell of fried dough and french fries wafting through the air. Not a person but a thing, a real thing. Food trucks and there at the edge of it the smell of chocolate and fresh rain. A strange scent mixed together but one Rey finds she doesn’t altogether hate. 

Another deep inhale and it’s there. Her eyes wide and clear she searches, it’s close, so close that she can taste the mud on her tongue. Like when Rian shoves his dirty fists in her mouth when they’re playing in the grass. It’s something that’s always driven her crazy but right now she can’t help but want it more than anything else. She would open her mouth and accept any blade of grass he wanted to feed her if only she had him back in her arms. 

Ornate metal fences lining a duck pond, cars parked at meters that are almost timed out. People in suits milling about as children skip down the sidewalk jumping over cracks in the pavement. It’s life and it’s happening all around her, happening without her because her heart is somewhere else. Her mind is lost and her soul has been crushed because no matter where she looks she cannot find him. His scent is there, just out of reach, driving her wild.

She feels like she’s going to go crazy, her skin itches and all she wants to do is scream. His name is there on her lips, loud and rough like it belongs to someone else. She calls it, again and again, looking up and down the sidewalks as her vision begins to swim. Tears line her lashes as she chokes out a sob then across the street she notices a man looking at her.

A tall man in a suit, his eyes wide, almost afraid, as if he can feel it, the sheer terror that snaps through her body like a broken electrical wire. He’s crouched on the ground no more than fifty feet away and there is no reason for her to think that he’s looking at her only he is, she knows he is. And standing in front of him… 

Bluejacket with sharks on it, black pants, light-up sneakers…

He’s pointing to her now, the small form of a child standing in front of him reaching up to touch his face. The little boy doesn’t turn but he doesn't need to because she knows it’s him. Rian is standing there with this stranger and all Rey can think is that this man is going to take him away from her. 

It happens in a split second. One minute she’s standing still the next her body is moving. Cars are honking, people are screaming and she’s surging across the busy street. Someone almost hits her, a man, an alpha by the smell of him is screaming out the window something that sounds like ‘ _crazy omgea bitch_ ’ but it doesn’t matter because she has to move. The man with her son is big and probably fast too if he wanted he could pick up the boy and take off. She feels a growl rumbling in her chest as another car bumps into her knees slowed down enough that it barely grazes her. It doesn’t matter, nothing is going to stop her from getting across this road short to being struck down dead. 

She will fight anyone who gets in her way. 

_Twenty feet…_ The man in the suit stands.

_Fifteen feet…_ He has his hands raised in defence.

_Ten feet…_ He’s taking a step back.

_Five feet…_ His scent hits her hard but her brain is too amped up on adrenaline to notice.

The space between them is minimal now, Rian in her arms as she swings him away, seating him on her hip. She presses her forehead against his, smelling his hair as the little boy reaches out for the man who is standing no less than two feet away. 

“Cho-co” he wines, his little hands grabbing at the air.

“Sweetheart,” she chides, her voice shaky and raw, “You can’t leave momma’s side like that…” she’s trying to remain calm, trying to steady her voice but it comes out as a rattle of emotions that she can’t seem to control. 

It’s with great reluctance that she puts him down, her arms shaking as she keeps one hand on the back of his head, her fingers scratching through his hair, “Who,” she starts loud, not a care for those around them, “the fuck,” she seethes through clenched teeth, “Do you think you are?” Lashing out she strikes the man in the chest pushing him back with more ease then should be allowed given his stature, “What were you thinking? I should call the fucking police!” 

Tall, and broad, his shoulders cloaked in a soft blue suit jacket clearly tailored to fit him. Rey knows it’s soft because she felt it beneath her palm when she pushed him. She feels it again when she goes to repeat the motion which he seems to allow without any complaint. 

“He’s just a kid!” she growls, baring her teeth as she squares her shoulders trying to make herself look as imposing as humanly possible. She’s not short but she’s petite and most people have a tendency to underestimate her tenacity, “What did you think you were—“ 

When he speaks it’s like being dunked into a vat of warm honey. Every syllable dripping over her mind, slow and sweet, “Omega,” he says softly before her name falls from his lips. She almost misses it, the soft utterance of, “ _Rey,_ ” because it sounds like it’s whispered. Said with such reverence that she simply cannot wrap her head around it. He’s using some alpha trick on her she knows it. Using his voice to calm her when all she wants to do rip his fucking throat out. 

A shiver slips along her spine pooling in her gut as she stares at him openly now. Dark hair swept back from his face, hanging loosely around his ears that peek out ever so slightly. Ears she knows, which seems odd because who recognizes ears? But his are distinctive. So are his eyes, not quite brown, not quite gold, the colour of rich cider or amber. A prominent nose that matches his long face and lips that are far too plush to be real. She knows him and yet doesn’t. His face altered by time, his name on her tongue melted sweetly like brown sugar. 

The scent of him is so strong it makes her dizzy as Rian stands at her back his little hands grabbing at air, “Cho-co, cho-co.” he mutters repeatedly. _Chocolate._

Hot chocolate and cinnamon, warm and sweet and something of home. Of nights sitting on the couch watching Cassian and Ben play some soccer game on whatever system Cassian managed to buy with the money he got from working. Cassian who taught her how to throw a punch and that being an omega didn’t have to mean submission. Cassian who had introduced her to Ben Solo, the older boy whom Rey would always consider her first love. 

Unrequited and juvenile but the kind that settles into your bloodstream and subtly changes you. 

“Rey?” She blinks because this man has said her name again and just like that she’s not angry anymore. Her shoulders loosen as she takes half a step back nearly stumbling over Rian who is still trying to grope passed her leg at the man in the suit. “It’s Rey right?” 

She nods, torn between reaching out to touch him again and grabbing her boy and hightailing it out of there. Something urges her to stay, her mind hooked on a scent that is drowning her in memories. She never had this with Owen, this biological draw that she’d always thought was dangerous. She’d chosen him, one of the few choices she was given in life and she had loved him through it all. Through heats he couldn't help with and obsessive nesting when she’d first gotten pregnant. The way her sex drive made her crazy the days coming up to her heat and how the hormones made her wild. It wasn’t ideal for an omega female to have a beta husband but Owen did his best and she had loved him for it. 

Still, there were things that she had missed out on, the way his scent couldn’t quite calm her down. How she never quite felt full enough without a knot locked inside her. The draw to another human being that is so strong it physically hurts. Something like what she’s experiencing right now. 

“You don’t recognize me do you?” he asks softly with a laugh, “It’s ok it’s been quite a while.” shaking his arm softly his watch rubs against the gland on his wrist causing his scent to bloom around them. 

Rian squeals hollering, “cho-co cho-co!” louder as he throws himself passed Rey’s legs and wraps his little arms around the stranger's lower leg. Rey isn’t sure if she should feel worried or mortified with the way Rian jumps up and down tugging at the fine material of the poor man's dress slacks. His hands are still a little dirty, BeeBee hanging helplessly from his small clenched fist. 

It hurts the way this man looks at her, the one she should know with the beautiful face and the constellation of moles that she can’t help but count. She takes stock of them like shells in the sand, precious and beautiful as they sit against his pale complexion. He’s laughing at Rian trying to urge him back in Rey’s direction but the little fella is a barnacle when he wants to be. He’s latched on tight whining about chocolate. 

“Sweetheart, come back to momma please,” her mouth waters a little as she says it, her skin itchy and tight like it’s being stretched too thin, worn and sore and hot, “Leave…”

“Ben,” he offers breathily, “It’s Ben.”

And suddenly her whole world tips on its side. The scent and the memory, the name and the face, the way he cocks his head to the side or chews on his lip, “Ben,” she repeats, half in a daze because she does know this man, it’s not a feeling or a whisper, it’s a marching band through her brain, “Ben Solo.” He smiles and nods bright and beautiful and real. How is he real?

“Christ it’s been —“

“—Ten years,” she offers without prompting, her cheeks warm against the cool spring breeze. Self-consciously she slips a strand of hair behind her ear, one of the few which managed to escape her messy thrown together bun.

“Yeah, ten years…” he parrots, his eyes jumping across her face, taking her in. His gaze feels like a physical thing, a weight that ebbs and shifts like sand in the tide. Marvel, wonder, awe, those are just a few of the words that come to mind as she watches him, watch her. Like she's walked straight out of a dream.

“Cho-co,” Rian whines with a particularly sharp tug at Ben’s pant leg and Rey pulls him away.

Ben laughs, his smile sweet and broad all crooked teeth and dimples, those she certainly remembers, “He's yours then," it's not a question but a confirmation

Rian squirms in her arms petulantly reaching for Ben, “Yeah, I’m so sorry.” 

“Hey no, it’s ok. Sorry for scaring you.” Ben holds his arms out in welcome, a silent question in his eye as he offers to take the squirming child from her arms, “He just sort of popped up and started saying—“

“—cho-co” Rian chirps happily waving BeeBee in Ben’s face.

“That.”

“Chocolate.” Rey offers by way of explanation. Letting Rian go to Ben feels strangely comforting. The voice inside her head that screams at her during her heats purrs softly at the sight of this large man cradling her son in his arms as though he were the most precious thing in the world. 

Ben bounces a little, adjusting Rian on his hip as the little boy laughs and cheers “cho-co, cho-co,” nuzzling his face against the front of Ben’s tailored jacket. 

“I don’t have any little one,” Ben sings softly, pressing his forehead against Rians in a way that is almost too familiar. He looks strange, his neck arched awkwardly as their noses brush against one another. Ben’s eyes crinkling at the side as Rian grabs a fist full of Ben’s hair. 

“Ohhh no no,” Rey soothes, taking Ben’s hair from Rian’s hand softly, “no… or you’re down.” 

“No dow, no dow!” Rian protests shaking Beebee again to make sure that Ben has seen his treasure. 

“Have you been in the area long?” Ben asks happily, shifting his weight from side to side as, his hips swaying in the way that Rain often likes. Like he knows, somehow just what to do, how to soothe a child, how to make them comfortable. A large kind alpha male who… there’s that shudder again, creeping up her neck like a hand gripping her skull pulling her closer, a hand guiding her into a kiss. A palm at the back of her head urging her down, mouth open for…

_ No… _

Her cheeks flush as the image of bare thighs and a thick weeping cock flash through her mind. Her palms warm as she rubs them against her jeans, desperately. Instead, she nods, “Bought a house down on Magnolia a few years back, we had to sell it though…” she blurts. 

“My parents live down that way, It’s strange I never saw you around. I’m over on Mayhew,” 

“Chandrilla district,” Rey nods, it’s a nice area, she knows it but not well. One of those places they take drives in the winter when Rain refuses to sleep. The houses are usually done up in bright twinkling lights that glitter like stars. The one thing she’s always loved about Christmas. 

“It’s weird to think we’ve been so close all this time…” Ben muses as he blows a raspberry in Rians face making the little boy giggle gleefully. His nose scrunching up, his eyes bright and happy as he claps his hands together hitting Ben in the face with his stuffed dog. 

Rey doesn’t have it in her to respond more than a smile and a soft nod. She wants to ask more, to know everything. Have him fill in the blanks of his life all ten years of them. She wants to know what he does, where he went to school, how his parents are, if he’s married. She wants to know what his skin tastes like, and what his hands feel link gripping her hips as he ruts into her from behind. 

A curling heat licks it’s way down along her spine, her skin flushed beneath her plain t-shirt and sweater. It’s not warm, the air is fresh but still a little on the cool side, the kind of weather she loves best. Still, she finds herself slipping her sweater over her shoulders, her wrists rubbing against the fabric dangerously. Ben can scent her, his nostrils flaring slightly as he adjusts Rian in his arms again.

There’s so much to say and yet nothing makes it past her lips. Words die in her throat because he knows. She can see that he knows. His eyes have gotten darker, the muscles of his neck standing out against the collar of his white button-down. He can tell that her heart rate has changed, that her body temperature is rising. 

Sweat trickles down her spine and soaks into her jeans, making her fidget uncomfortably. “Rey…” and the way he says her name, deep and sweet like he’s trying to soothe her, like he wants to soothe her. “Are you—“ but one doesn’t ask questions like this in public, let alone in polite company. Because she knows what he’s going to ask. Her quads feel like she’s run a half marathon and granted she’d pushed herself hard but this level of pressure and ache doesn’t make sense. There are only two instances where she experiences pains like these. When she’s starting her period and when she’s going into heat. She hasn’t had her heat yet so the period doesn’t make sense but her heat isn’t for another month or more. 

She’s been like clockwork since Rian was born, every four months down to the day. 

Ben’s swallows visibly as he presses his lips together, wetting them before they part and he’s trying to breathe through his mouth, “I—“ she starts but what exactly is she supposed to say to him?

That voice in her head, the one that purrs at the sight of him demands she present him her neck, show him her belly. Roll over and give yourself to him, this alpha who cares for your pup. _Show him you would be a good mate_ , it whines.

“Should I call your husband?” Ben asks quickly, his voice harsh almost angry as he takes a half a step back. The sound makes her whimper as she falls into a bend, her hand supporting her weight on her knees, “You shouldn’t be out in public like this Rey,” as if she doesn’t know. 

“No Daddy,” Rian sings softly, “Mommy Daddy,” he explains. His way of understanding that Rey does the job of both his mother and his father. The simple understanding of a child in a world who has known nothing but the love of his mother. It hurts sometimes to hear, but he says it so happily its hard not to feel a soft lick of pride. Rian has her and she has him and it’s been ok so far. 

“We’re alone.” she says quickly, sucking in a breath through clenched teeth before holding her arms out to take Rian, “I’ll take him I need to get home.” 

“Is there someone who can watch him for you?”

“Yeah, eff, I should text her,” reaching for her phone she realizes she’s left it back in the car, _shit._ Another cramp hits her, her legs shaking as she hoists Rian onto her hip. Her heats have never come on this quickly before. The next cramp hits her like a freight train, knocking the wind out of her. She’s doubling over, Rian squawking in protest as Ben scoops the little boy out of her arms, steading her awkwardly. 

“Ooookay then. Did you drive here?” she nods, “Parked?” she points to the park across the street where her old Jetta sits in the parking lot waiting. He mumbles something she can’t make out as his arm wraps around her shoulder and the next thing she knows Ben is leading her across the street. Rian sings happily in his arms as they make their way passed gawking onlookers. 

It has to look horrible, Rey in ripped jeans, and a plain black shirt, her converse sneakers ripped on the sides lead by a man in a bespoke suit. “Momma dick!” Rian calls as Ben’s hand slips from her shoulder. They’re still moving, his long legs seem to take half steps to keep up with her short pace. She can hear him talking but can’t make out to who as his hand presses between her shoulder blades. His palm is warm as it slides down her back guiding her along with him until they reach her car.  


“Here,” she mutters, thanking the high heavens that no one seems to have taken anything. Even Rian's backpack is still there sitting in the dirt where she left it. 

“Yeah, I’ll be out the rest of the afternoon,” she hears Ben say, looking up to see him on the phone. He cradles the small device in one hand as he slides Rian down with the other moving swiftly to the back door where his car seat sits. “No, no, you’ll be fine, just text me if you have any issues.” Ben opens the door crooking his finger to call Rian forward. The little boy hops, once, twice, three times before landing at Ben’s feet. “Get your backpack.” Ben says softly, his hand covering the mouthpiece, “No, Mitaka, seriously. Well if they said that then that’s their problem, not ours.” 

Rey watches, leaning against the car as Ben runs his fingers through his hair. Ben Solo, the boy who used to hug her and tell her she was special. The boy who always smiled and stroked her nose before stealing away her book, or her pencil or whatever object she might have hidden in her grasp taking off in a run. He would tease her the way bothers did until all that had changed. He had changed.

That wasn’t fair it had been Rey that had changed. Her designation might as well have been branded on her forehead like a scarlet letter, “I’m telling you right now, handle it. I don’t care— No, no now it’s your turn to listen. I will check in later. Goodbye Mitaka, no… goodbye.” With a growl he hangs up the phone flipping a switch on the side before shoving it in his pocket, “Commere big guy,” he hums hoisting Rian into the air high before slipping him into the car. The little boy hits his head on the door frame with a grumbled ‘ _oweie_ ’ as Ben apologizes and tickles his belly pulling Rian’s arms through the straps of his seat as though he’s done this a million times. “Call your care provider,” he says over the open door, “And get in, I’ll drive you home.” 

She wants to open her mouth to protest but all that comes out is a ragged sob. Her pants are wet, sweaty and covered in slick as she climbs into the seat, Ben’s eyes watching her every movement. She needs to call Maz…. she needs to call Maz and she needs to do it quickly. There’s no stopping this now. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW: Rey was married before, he was in the military and died before coming home
> 
> Welp... I did that. I don't think I need to tell you what happens in chapter two which I am editing as soon as I'm done with this and will post shortly as long as things don't implode which sometimes they do. 
> 
> Come say Hi on [The Twitter](https://twitter.com/rebelscumreylo)


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I smell like chocolate?” Lifting up his arm he peers under searching for her, trying to turn around but she holds him in place.
> 
> “Not just chocolate but hot cocoa and cinnamon,” she offers him dreamily her hands curling around his chest to hold him still. He’s so much bigger then he had been then, no longer the skinny kid with the goofy smile, “You didn’t even like hot chocolate.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah... this is just smut and plot holes.   
> It happens when I don't make an outline haha ENJOY!
> 
> CW in notes

The drive back to her apartment is whirlwind of sensations. Rian sings happily in the front seat as Rey curls in on her self, trying to put as much space between her and Ben as she can. In close proximity, his scent is both the best and worst thing she’s ever experienced. He’s everything, and her traitorous body knows it. Every instinct she has, every small piece of her rational being but the one thread she clings to tells her to submit. It would make it so much easier if she would just let herself go. 

He would take care of her, she knows in her heart of hearts but there’s something there edging into his scent that makes her keep her distance. Something dark and smooth and dangerously sweet that curls into her senses and makes her heart flutter. He’s anxious but aroused and it’s confusing because it both frightens her and whispers to her to soothe him, to use her body to calm his soul, to let him take her, use her, _claim_ her… 

Shaking her head she presses her forehead against the door frame and lets the cool air lick at her face. It feels nice against her heated skin all the while making her eyes water. That’s ok though, it hides the tears that linger along her lashes. The ones she wants to cry but can’t because this is far too absurd and she needs to get Rian taken care of first.

Maz had been confused of course but promised to meet them at her apartment. She was heading over there now so she could pack a bag filled with several days worth with of toys and clothes. Generally Rey’s heats last about four days give or take. Five at most depending on her proximity to an alpha. She’s never had anyone see her through one before, not that she's planning on having someone see her through this one… 

The Omega in her brain purrs quietly urging her towards him. It tells her how strong he is, how well he would take care of her. Begs her to let him relieve the burning that tears through her body threatening to turn her to ash. 

Absently she can hear him muttering to himself, everything heightened, scent, hearing, taste, _emotion_. Everything swirling in a vortex of confusion as she struggles to maintain some semblance of control. He’s upset, _she’s_ upset him and it makes her want to cry even more, curling her knees to her chest so that she can make herself just a little smaller. If they were ever pulled over there would be a multitude of reasons to issue a ticket. 

Ben is taking the speed signs as suggestions more than law as he guides Maybell through the back streets avoiding the congestion of traffic. At this point, her heat is scant moments away from taking all reason out of her hands completely. Having an Omega in heat in public is tantamount to disturbing the peace, undoubtedly a second strike. Then there’s her lack of a seatbelt. Not something she takes joy in but the fabric hurts her skin as it falls across her chest. 

As though picking up on her spiking concern Ben reaches out, his hand touching lightly against her shoulder with a softly cooes, “Hey… it’s ok.” but it isn’t ok. Not in the slightest. She wants to laugh at the absurdity of it all. This man she knew as a boy, the smell of him so strong and nauseatingly sweet. A scent that Rian had picked up on and followed without a thought or a care. 

There was some meaning there wasn’t there? 

Some reason that had to make sense otherwise this was all just one very large, very strange coincidence. 

Maybe the universe is laughing at her, “Rey, I’m so sorry, I promise it’s not you,” he utters softly. She can see him turning to look at her, hands back on the wheel as he takes another turn. “I usually keep emergency blockers on me but they’re back in my office, I was just stepping out for lunch…” 

What was he saying? 

Emergency what?

His words fall on deaf ears and she takes a deep breath in through her mouth which is probably the wrong thing to do because his scent is _everywhere_. She can taste it, thick and heavy as it slides over the back of her tongue, coating her throat in the torturously delicious scent that screams _home, home, home_ , in her head like a dinner bell rung at high noon. He’s everything her body thinks it needs. 

Stupid body, what does it know? 

“I’m going to leave as soon as I get you settled,” she hears and her mind starts to reel, his words mismatched and strange, only some of them bleeding through the haze, “not safe.”

“What?” she croaks.

“I said,” he offers more softly, his eyes catching the rearview mirror and the little boy in the back seat who’s moved on to singing ‘ _baby shark_ ’ gleefully, “Your heat, it’s triggering my rut and I left my emergency blockers back at the office.” Rey’s mind clings to the way his voice struggles, the gravelly way he says the words _heat_ and _rut_ like it pains him to think about it. “I’ll make sure you’re safe and secure and then I need to leave.”

She hears herself whimper, actually whimper. The idea of being alone without his scent wrapped around her... without the weight of his body pressed up against her, pinning her down as he… 

“—didn’t want to assume—“

Turning her head she catches the way he's looking at her. Stopped at a stop sign with no signs of traffic around Ben takes a steady breath in. His hands on the steering wheel are white-knuckled as he slowly rocks his fists against the worn leather making it creek beneath his hold. She could reach out and touch him, close the gap between them and rub her face against his neck, bury herself in his scent. It would be easy to do, every inch of her begging for it. His eyes, like molten gold watch, the pupils blown wide as his chest heaves and he works his lower lip between his teeth with the softest huff of a groan. 

She watches him peel his hand away from the steering wheel carefully and press the heel of his palm against the front of his pants almost without thought. The action makes his scent swirl around her heady and thick. When he moans again she thinks it might break her, watching him press and paw at the outline of an erection she wishes he hadn’t brought her attention to. 

“Go, Go, Go.” Rian chimes from the back seat, breaking whatever hold the hormones have on them. 

_Thank fuck for that_. 

Rey was about thirty seconds from climbing onto his lap… She needs to get Rian into Maz’s arms, get in her apartment and lock the doors. Through the hazy of her mind she tries to run through the things she has in her cupboards and fridge, things she can snack on. None of her usual favourites, no heavenly hash ice cream or pressed ripe fruit bars. There might be a protein bar or two and some leftover Chinese food. It would have to do. What choice did she have?

* * *

Maz is sitting on the curb with Rian’s backpack all packed when Ben pulls the car into Rey’s spot. He looks strange climbing out of the busted up old thing, his body unfolding into something to be respected. Maz however does not look impressed.   


“Ben Solo!” she calls loudly, pushing herself up and onto her feet, dusting off her trousers as she stretches out her limbs, “What are you doing here?”

He beats her to Rian’s door and has the little one mostly extracted before Rey is even able to unfurl herself from her huddled position. Rian chants, “Maz, Maz, Maz,” Happily as Ben places him on the ground letting the toddler run over to diminutive woman launching himself into her arms happily, “Cho-co cho-co, ‘e mell cho-co” the little boy says excitedly pointing a finger towards Ben.

“He smells like chocolate does he?” the older woman responds with a grin, picking Rian up so that he’s sitting on her shoulders. Rian bounces happily as Maz pats his thigh and urges him to be still less she drop him, “Are you responsible for this boy?”

Ben’s at her side before Rey knows what he’s doing, scooping her up into his arms as though she weighs nothing at all, “I don’t know,” he tries but Rey can see the way Maz narrows her eyes, large still beneath the magnification of her aged but timeless glasses, “Maybe?” Ben tries, “Ok probably, I don’t know what happened.” 

Crouching down to pick up Rian’s backpack the tiny woman throws the strap over her shoulder balancing out the little boy who still makes grabby hands towards Ben, “I grabbed you a few things, there’s towels by the microwave for you and I got out your old blankets and made your bed. There are sports drinks in the fridge and I picked up a few cucumbers and apples.” Some of Rey’s favourite things, “You call me if you need anything,” Maz instructs with a finger, “You need me to get you in or is Moose here ok to do it?” 

“I got her Maz—“

“I wasn’t asking you, Ben.”

Maz is concerned, she doesn’t want to say anything, doesn’t want to draw attention to it, but there are worry lines etched in her face. She’s never seen Rey with anyone other than Owen and though she seems to know Ben, how Rey isn’t quite sure, she’s lingering all the same. Lurking like a cat waiting to see if she should dig her claws in or let them go.

“I’ll be fine Maz, thanks.” she urges Ben to put her down, regretting it the minute that her feet touch the ground. Her legs buckle but Ben’s hand is at her elbow to steady her in a heartbeat, “Give momma some love,” she says softly as Rian bends down over Maz’s shoulder to rub his nose against his mothers. “You be good for Maz ok?”

Rian nods happily, as Maz gives them one last look over. Her eyes lingering on where Ben’s arm disappears behind Rey’s back, “I walked so I’ll be on my way. Benjamin.” She says his name firmly, like a mother warning a child to behave but leaves it at that. 

Ben merely nods. Rey can feel him moving at her back but can’t focus on what it is he might be doing. The car door shuts, then she hears the echo of the lock and he’s back at her side sweeping her off of her feet once again.

“I can walk,” Rey mumbles pathetically, her arms sliding around Ben’s neck, only to feel more secure of course. The action drags her wrists across the scent glands causing him to gasp and then growl ever so slightly. He’s on edge she realizes, his body tense beneath her hold as he makes his way up the steps. 

Her home is a triplex in the form of an old victorian home. The man who lives in the basement is a kind old soul who calls himself Yoda. He looks like he might be well into his nineties but he still manages to live by himself. He walks every day and tends to a small garden in the back that all three tenants share. The upstairs tenant is a younger woman who rarely ever comes home, a flight attendant Rey thinks or someone who travels a lot which is nice because sometimes Rian can make _a lot_ of noise. Thankfully Mr. Yoda is nearly deaf.

Rey and Rian live in on the main floor, the floors are done in a lovely hardwood that's been cut into thin strips, stained different tones of brown and laid out in a pattern to look like a mosaic. It’s hard to heat in the winter and way to warm in the summer but it’s home. Two bedrooms, one large kitchen, a bathroom with both a shower and an old claw foot tub and a living room that opens into a sun porch. It’s not much but it’s her version of perfect. 

Ben helps her through the front door into the sun porch but struggles with the main door. It sticks sometimes when the weather changes, the wood swelling and the house shifting but after one rather boisterous push with his shoulder he has the damn thing open and the smell of home rushes to meet her. 

“Ok, let’s…” he starts as Rey nuzzles her nose against his neck, fuck he smells good. _So good_ she just wants to… her tongue darts past her lips quickly swiping a soft line along the angle of his jaw up to his ear causing him to shudder. “Rey,” he warns, his voice dark and delicious, “Please…”

“I thought it was supposed to be me begging,” she quips lightly, wiggling down onto her feet. He lets her go slowly, allowing her to pour out of his hold like molasses, her hands resting against his chest as she finds her footing using Ben for stability.

Like this she only comes up to his chin, nuzzling her nose against the soft fabric of his button-down. It smells like rich cologne but there underneath is the scent that she knows so well. That deep milky chocolate with the spiced scent of cinnamon... The buttons are small and clear as her fingers trip over them one by tone, not undoing them but toying with them, showing him she _could_ if she wanted to and oh how she wants to. 

“What do you need before I leave?” there’s that word again, _leave._ Her inner Omega bucks against the idea, a veritable tantrum as it pushes her to beg, _show him_ it keens, _show him how good you can be for him. On your knees, on your knees._ Instead, she continues to toy softly with his buttons tugging lightly at his belt when her fingers make their way down to his waist. 

“I—“ she starts and Ben freezes beneath her touch. It’s there hanging between them, a need she’s afraid to voice. Not just to him but to herself. 

Blanket, warm towels, he could help with that of course. Cut up food for her maybe and leave it in the fridge but the one thing she really needs, the one thing she aches for… 

Ben takes a sharp breath when her fingers trace softly along the raised form of his cock straining against the fine material of his dress slacks, “Don’t,” practically growls, trying to catch her hand before she’s able to apply any more pressure.

He fails. 

Miserably.

Groaning as she palms him, rubbing lightly along his length as she nuzzles her nose against his chest. She loves how wide he is, the type of body she’s always dreamt of wrapped around her. “I can’t.” he says through a release of sharp air, “Rey, I—“

“Don’t want me?” she offers sadly, cocking her head to the side staring at these damn buttons again, watching the way they struggle to keep the fabric of his shirt closed. 

The noise Ben makes is something close to feral, “Rey, you aren’t thinking clearly,” he tries to reason, her mind feral at the idea of him mansplaining her heat to her. The voice inside her head barking with displeasure, desperate to find a way to fix it or lash out. Get on your _knees_ , it screams loud and insistent, a howling in her head that simply won’t stop until Rey finds herself dropping before him. Sinking to her knees her palms run along his thighs carefully before tugging at his belt and nuzzling her nose against the hard edge of his cock. “Rey— fuck!” 

His hands grope for her elbows pulling her to her feet before she has a chance to push it any further. She whimpers and whines, the rational part of brain slipping as she tries to touch him again. Still, his hands stop her search, holding her with a gentle insistence that calms her nerves just a little. Like a weighted blanket, the pressure of his hands soothes her. His lips ghosting across her knuckles softly as he allows them both some time to think. 

Another cramp and her skin feels like it’s on fire. She needs a cold shower but she’s not fool enough to try. The water will only hurt, anything and every thing touching her skin is too much. Without thought, she tugs at the hem of her t-shirt pulling it up and over her head leaving her in simple purple lace bralette. “Ben, _Alpha_ —“ she hears herself cry, “It hurts.” 

“I know sweetheart,” his arms wrap around her drawing her to him, his lips trailing kisses along the sweat-slick ridge of her hairline. “You need a knot, I know.” he says into her hair, his body shuddering as her fingertips flick open one of his shirt buttons. 

“Never had one,” she mutters against the soft white fabric. Another twitch and another button is loosened. 

“Never?”

Shaking her head she works her fingers slowly down the line, careful to take her time, one button and then another in a slow succession until he’s dress shirt lies open to the waist. Milky white skin sitting beneath, the softest tickle of dark hair found in the dip between his pecs and around each nipple. Nipples she allows her fingers to slip over smoothly before pressing her lips against one in an open-mouthed kiss. 

Ben groans, his head falling back as her tongue flickers across the small raised nub. For just a minute it's quiet, no more then the sound of breathing and time as Ben's hands squeeze her shoulders while Rey traces the fine definition of Ben's pecs with her tongue. 

After a breath, maybe two, her jaw starts to quiver, a question on her tongue that she desperately needs to know the answer to. “Will you…” she starts, sucking in a sharp breath as she wills her eyes upwards. It’s not a question you ask someone's chest, but a request made face to face. She needs to see his reaction to know whether it’s genuine, “will you help me?” she asks, watching as Ben’s eyes go wide, his hands trembling as they reach up to cup her own. 

“Are you sure?” Is all he manages with a gasp. 

No, yes, never more so in her life… Answers bounce around in her head leaving her with no other response but a nod. “No… no little one,” Ben coos softly, “I need to hear you say it.” 

One breath.

Two breaths.

“I’m sure,” soft, almost demure, “I want your knot, Ben.” Then with a ragged sigh, she adds, “Alpha.” 

When he kisses her it happens fast and hard. Their lips bang together gracelessly as Ben slots his mouth carelessly over hers. He’s there walking her back against the wall until the cool drywall meets her flesh. Pressed between it and the warm body of Ben Solo with his lips working against her own has her on sensory overload and they haven’t even started yet. 

Their noses bump and then his is pressed into her cheek. A hand at her breast makes her gasp as he pulls it free from the lace, taking advantage of the moment to sweep his tongue in against hers. Ben groans as he pinches her nipple and then runs his thumb delicately over top of it soothing the sting, “Wanted you—“ he says against her lips, “So long—“ admissions made in the heat of the moment are never something to put much stock in but there’s something in his desperate growl, in the way he stops and looks at her that makes her think maybe, just maybe she should listen. “You’re beautiful,” he tells her softly, a hand cupping her cheek as he dips in for another kiss. Something softer this time, gentle and sweet. The kind of kiss that has no place in a moment like this but Rey finds that she savours it all the same. 

“Warm towels?” He offers pulling away, his hand still feathered against her jaw, “Full disclosure, I’ve never seen an Omega through a heat before.” 

Rey blinks a few times, “A new experience for both of us then.” 

“Your son’s father wasn’t—“

Rey shakes her head softly, “Beta,” she knows what he’s thinking. Rian is a miracle baby. Omega and Beta couples often struggle to conceive. There's a scientific reason, something involving sperm counts and the nature of an Omega’s egg. While typically considered to be incredibly fertile an Omega’s eggs have a fascial membrane around it that makes it harder to penetrate. Alpha’s produce and release more sperm therefore the potential for conception is much higher. Alpha females have an even harder time unless mated with another Alpha which was rare in and of itself. 

Science. 

“So you’ve never — I’d be —“ Ben’s chest puffs out slightly as the realization truly dawns on him, “Are we—?”

“Implant and I’m clean, I haven’t been with anyone since Rian’s father.” 

“Is he…” Ben looks around almost as though worried Owen might pop up from around acorner.

“Gone,” Passed away is implied and she knows that Ben understands then his lips press softly against hers once more.

“I’m sorry.” before adding more hastily, “Oh I’m clean too…” Thank god because condoms and heats were not a thing that generally go hand in hand. Slick and condoms make for a complicated fuck, something she’d learned early on in her life. Not that she made it a point to have unprotected sex with strangers but Ben wasn’t really a stranger now was he?

“Do you want me to heat up some towels?”

Right yes, warm towels would be good and blanket she needs blankets. Pushing Ben back Rey finds the pile left by Maz waiting on the couch waiting. Ben, with the reluctance of a man desperate to do something with his mouth again, busies himself with the task of heating up the towels. 

The space gives her time to think, or try and think at least. Her brain jumping through concepts faster then she can process. Like whirling through a Rolodex she tries to make sense of all that is happening. Her body screams at her to remove her clothing, instinct dictates she make a nest while the Omega in her brain demands she find her place beneath her Alpha and make herself ready to receive his seed. Heats are strange like that. One the one hand Rey has always sworn one child is enough but the closer she comes to her heats, the stronger the baby fever gets. And now, right this minute, she’s prepared to rip the implant out and gorge herself on Ben’s cum.

By the time Ben makes his way into the room she had indicated as hers, Rey has managed to weave and tie together a number of blankets. It’s not much but it’s soft and it’s soothing. She’s rid herself of her clothing is laying in the pile of blankets with her fingers pushed deep inside her cunt writhing and moaning. Ben, to his credit, does not lose his cool. He spreads out the warm towels giving Rey something to nuzzle against as he begins to systematically remove his clothing. 

He watches her like a man condemned, eyes wide drinking her in. It must be a sight her legs spread wide, heels pressed against the bed as she pushes herself onto her fingers trying desperately to get just a little bit more. She shivers beneath his gaze as he steps out of his boxer briefs and kneels on the end of the bed.   


His touch is a holy experience, her body coming alive as his fingers trace along the inside of her leg. Palms soothing along her things until his thumbs are just scant inches from where she needs them to be. “Such a pretty girl.” he sings softly, “Such a good sweet girl.” Her inner Omega preens as he takes her fingers from inside her body and brings them to his lips. His tongue is warm as he sucks them slowly into his mouth. The guttural sound he makes has her knees shuddering as he pulls them out with an audible pop, “Mine,” her murmurs licking along her palm and up to her index finger which he accents with a gentle nip. “My sweet little Omega,”

It’s enough to make her come, the need laced in Ben’s voice as he growls and softly licks the scent gland at her wrist.

After that, it’s hard to tell what sets it all in motion. A flurry of sensations that makes her flesh sing. One long swipe of his tongue along her spine. Gentle kisses across her upper back, fingertips kneading at her hips as he bites into her shoulder. The pressure of teeth, mixed with the dangerously close proximity to her mating glad and Rey’s mind goes blissfully blank for a few glorious moments. Not the release she knows is coming but something euphoric that she’s never really experienced before. 

It’s like learning how to swim in a pool and then jumping off a boat and into the ocean. The mechanics are the same but the stakes are suddenly a lot higher. 

His fingers traipse along her back, her body arching into the touch like a cat. When his hands find her hips again he gives her a sharp tug, pulling her back end into the air a little more. This isn’t what she wants, she needs his knot, needs to feel him buried deep inside her but his breath ghosting across her backside stills her protest. “Shhh, sweet girl,” he urges, she must have been whimpering. 

All she wants is to feel him pressed against her and Ben? He’s simply taking his time, “I don’t want to hurt you Omega, I need you good and ready for me ok?”

“Alpha please,” she whines into the cocoon of warm towels wiggling her hips impatiently as a trail of slick slowly drips down along her inner thigh. She can feel the way her pussy clenches around nothing, empty and sad as Ben blows softly against her labia.

“So wet for me,” he muses. The bed shifts and that’s when she feels it, his tongue dragging up the length of her thigh tracing the glistening trail back to its source. He takes his time, lapping at the slick that leaks from her aching cunt until he’s satisfied. His hands, large and strong, hold her still. Spreading her wide as his nose bumps against her opening, his tongue running along the seam of her messy wet cunt causes Rey to gasp. 

She mewls and whimpers pulling the warm towel around her face as Ben’s cheeks bump against her thighs. She can feel him as he delves deeper between her legs, his tongue giving her a broad lick along the entire length of her slit. A growl rumbles through his chest, a tremor of vibrations that Rey can feel each time he tastes her. It’s simultaneously too much and not enough, her mind trying to make sense of the sensations mixed with their reality. Still, he kisses and licks, his nose nuzzling against her perineum as she presses back against him. 

The action causes Ben to pause, his tongue still as he draws back and nips the inside of her leg, “Don’t be greedy, little one,” the warning is as sweet as honied wine as Ben slowly slips one finger into her, smiling against her thigh while kissing softly the small patch of flesh he’d previously punished.

It’s hard to tell what the bigger turn on is, the way Ben’s tongue slips inside along with his finger or the way he revels in it. He delights in every squeal and moan, chasing after the sound with eager veracity. Every dribble of slick is met with a broad swipe of his tongue, every moan with a wiggle of his finger. He’s delighted to take her apart piece by agonizing piece. 

The slide of his finger is sweet and yet agonizingly slow as he works it into her. His tongue trailing up and along her opening until it swirls against the area no one has ever touched before. The sensation is odd but not unpleasant, her thighs tightening as she lets herself relax into the sensation. It doesn’t last long, a soft hello as Ben’s one finger becomes two and the stretch becomes something a little more then she’s what she’s used to giving herself. 

It’s still not enough, a promise of more to come maybe but the movement is almost inconsequential. Her body wound too tight, her mind lost to its need to be filled and fucked and sated. When he scissors his fingers she groans, a soft ‘ _good girl’. His words_ floating through the air as Ben’s tongue swirls at her clit. 

He groans with her when clenches around his fingers murmuring praise against her dripping core as he mouths at it lazily. It’s hard to stop the whimpers, the keening moans, the begging that follows, “More,” she urges, “Alpha please I need—“

Ben’s chuckle feels like an avalanche, a smooth rumble that vibrates through her thighs and up into her belly “— I know what you need sweet girl,” he purrs as he brings her clit between his lips and sucks ever so lightly. 

When she comes, it’s not a cresting wave building up from a distance ocean. The kind she’s used to. The ones that curl along her spine licking and hissing until she’s crying out. It happens as a series of explosions. Bright and hot as she presses herself back against Ben’s face. This time there’s no admonishment, only the deep growl of a man on the edge lapping at her slick as it gushes down her legs. His fingers fuck her through it drawing out the tiny eruptions as the detonate through her core, her legs trembling as she slumps forward. 

She can feel the satisfied smirk on his lips still as his mouth moves across her skin. His tongue is diligent and languid as he collects every last drop of slick afraid to let anything go to waste. Once satisfied with his job she feels him work his way up along her ass, a wet line drawn along her spine. There’s teeth and plush wet lips and the sweet slide of his tongue until his mouth is at her neck just there at her mating glad. For just a second she wonders if he might sink his teeth into it realizing with some horror that she might actually _want_ him to. 

Instead, it’s his tongue swirling against the swollen and tender flesh, tracing the ridges with delicate care, “Fuck—“ he moans, his teeth sliding against it enough to make her come again, “The way you taste.” Oh, how she wants him to go on, torn between her want of sweet words of praise and then desperate desire to finally feel full.

His body is hot and heavy over hers caging her in against the bed, “Little Omega,” his cock sliding against her thigh, thick and wanting, “my sweet girl, I’m going stuff you full of my cock.” The tip of his nose roots behind her ear as a hand slides up along her body kneading softly at her breast before landing on her belly. “I’m going to put a baby right here little one.”

“More, more,” Rey hears herself whimper, it must be her voice because there’s no one else here but Ben but everything is happening in flashes, pieces that slide together in a dizzying array of heat and pressure and — oh. His cock slips between her legs gliding through her slick folds before bumping against her clit. 

“Not like this,” Yet he ruts against her, the easy-glide so close to what she needs but not quite enough, “Fuck— so wet—“ fingers pinch her nipple again, a hand soothing along her belly cradling it with gentle, easy strokes, “My sweet needy girl. My beautiful Omega”

His cock notches against her causes her to loose a breathy moan, “Yours, all yours.” In a way, she wonders if it always has been if she’s been waiting for this one moment when Ben would come back to her. His guarded smiles, his distant longing, “Want you, please.”

Heavy breath falls against her neck, “I want to — ngnhh,” His hips shudder against her backside, “Need you to— fuck — on your back Rey.” When she doesn’t move his teeth find her shoulder sharp and insistent, “Now Omega,” and _oh_ how the command makes her quiver. The end of something, a control willing given over as Ben pulls away and Rey finds herself flopped on her side nuzzling into the blankets. When she shifts onto her back Ben is there, always there staring down at her with eyes so dark and full of wonder.

“Hi.” Her lips quirk in a smile, bottom lip between her teeth as she reaches out and touches his face. Smooth cheeks, along a soft jawline and a mouth that’s lined with dimples. He’s every bit a man but so much of the boy she once knew flickers beneath the surface. 

Ben nuzzles against her palm kissing the heel as he mutters a soft, “Hello sweetheart,” back, “You ok?” 

“Ben…” 

Resting down on his elbows she feels him at her neck, his nose pressed against her glad before bathing it in soft kisses, “Such a good girl.” How sweet it sounds, soft praise that makes her keen, his voice raspy against her throat, “I’ve got what you need don’t worry.” The slick glide of his cock against her labia makes her gasp once again. The head bumping against her belly as he ruts his knot into her core. It’s thicker here, a little softer too she discovers, reaching out to press him between her palm and the slick heat of her cunt. 

Ben’s hips stop their slow grind as he pulls back to watch. Fingertips, slow and curious trace around the edges gathering slick in order to smear it along his length. Carefully she rocks her hips, revealing in the slide as his glans slips into the heat of her opening. A little more pressure and she has him where she needs him most. 

With a roll of his hips her lips part in a silent cry, and he pushes and pushes until he’s disappearing inside her, “Fuuuuck—“ he grunts, “So— so tight.”

More, she needs more, so much _more_. Canting her hips she feels him press a little further and this is the part she misses most. The warm slow stretch, the overwhelming fullness that grows and grows the more he sinks into her until she’s stuffed full. Too full. Until there is no space left inside her that isn’t him. 

His lips brush against hers, soft and sweet, the perfect contrast to the way her body adjusts to his. Slowly she feels herself begin to relax, muscles releasing she never knew she’d been holding so tightly. And then she feels it, the hitch of something further sinking in, a deeper stretch as the swollen edges of Ben’s knot finds itself home.

He settles around her like a blanket as his hips slowly start to move. Forearms pressed into the bed beside her head, flex beneath his weight, steady and strong pushing his hips flushed with hers. His hair, once pulled back away from his face now falls over his brow ticking her forehead. For lack of something better to do with her hands she throws them around his neck and now they’re fucking. They’re really fucking.

Each push of his hips is met but a gentle nudge of her own and soon he’s pounding her into the mattress. His strokes steady and unrelenting. Grinding against her with a muttered, “So tight— sweet little cunt—“ falling devilishly from his lips. Soon it’s all she can do to hold on, his body pressed tightly against hers, chest hot and damp with each slide of skin. 

“Wanna— nghh fuck Rey—“ he grinds out, a hand on her neck, cupping her face as he pulls her in for a sloppy kiss. Their mouths bang against one another, as he moves from her lips to her jaw and then his tongue is on her neck, “Need,” he moans, “Need to feel you come.” 

And she wants nothing more than to give it to him, the coiling heat a warm calm against her soul as it flutters to life. Each stroke of his hips stoking the flames higher and higher until they threaten to burn her alive. She teeters on the edge, her inner walls fluttering around him. Then his angle changes and it’s slipping away from her like sand through her fingertips. 

A frustrated groan lingers at her throat as Ben nips around at one of her glands. It’s not as dizzying as the one on the back of her neck but still, the sensation makes her light-headed, “Bite me,” she growls her eyes fluttering closed and his trusts start to slow. Her words, their meaning sinking into his skin like soft cream, “Mate me Ben,” not Alpha but Ben… there’s meaning there too but the Omega inside of her head demands it. Teeth sharp and raw piercing her skin, marking her flesh that has gone unmarred for so long. 

“Don’t—“ his words are hazy his eyes glossy and dark as he pulls back to look down at her, and what a sight she must be. Hair wild and tousled, her skin pink and flushed with a thin sheen of sweat, “Fuck Rey— Don’t,” he warns, “You have — You don’t—“

“I do, I do, _I do,_ ” she chants lost in the sensation of his cock so deep they start to feel like one being, “Mate me,” the makings of his knock swell as he works himself harder, deeper, maintaining his slow and easy pace. Each snap of his hips sends her jolting up the bed, before long he won’t be able to pull out at all. 

Wiggling beneath him Rey thrashes, desperate for his mouth on her neck, “Bite me Alpha _please_.”

His growl is inhuman, as he pulls himself away pulling her legs up so they rest on his shoulders. The new angle shifts him deeper but gives him space from her maddening plea. She both hates it and loves it all at the same time. His pubic bone slides against her clit granting her a new sensation one, each stroke squelching obscenely.

Desperate for something to hang onto Rey grasps at the sheets kneading the towels that had once been comforting and warm but now lie beneath them saturated in slick. 

“Good girl, sweet girl, perfect girl,” Each word punctuated with the sudden drive of Bens pelvis. His breathing growing ragged. He’s struggling now, his knot almost too much. The way he’s having a hard time pushing it into her enough to steal the breath from her lungs. 

A litany of dirty things falling from his lips, “Gonna— cum inside— gonna mmmhhh— fill your pretty cunt — so full.”

It doesn’t take long before she’s there again, teetering on the edge, lost in the sounds their bodies make as they connect. Whimpers and the wet slap of skin against skin as his thighs meet hers over and over. “Not enough,” he growls and without warning he’s dropping her legs, picking her up. Like a rag doll, her body complies, completely at his mercy as he sits back on his haunches and pulls her into his lap. Her knees barely touch the blankets, the bouncing gone in lieu of heavy grinding and this, this is what she needed. Ben’s hands hold her in place, large fingers spread against her mid and low back as his tongue laps at her neck greedily. He’s impossibly deeper this way holding her together like a bow on a string, “Come for me—“ he instructs, as though he can coax her orgasm out of her by words alone.

It’s not just words though it’s everything about him. The way he cradles her close, keeping her safe and secure against the broad planes of his chest. It’s the stretch of his cock so blissfully thick as it makes itself at home in her body. It’s the trust, the affection in his eyes as he kisses her, jarring as the embrace may be. “Come for me sweetheart,” again, with such reverence she gasps, so desperate not to disappoint him. Every slide of her hips is met by the undulating of his as he rocks harder and harder into her. “Fu—uuuuck are you— are you close? — Wanna— wanna feel it.”

“Yes!” and she is. He mouthes sloppily at her jaw as it hits her, that last and final push that has her tumbling over the edge. A precipice with a fall so steep she doesn’t know if she’ll ever touch the ground again. There’s no sound but the high-pitched gasping of air as her back arches. A blistering heat swims through her veins and there’s nothing she can do but be held by him her slick saturating his thighs in a gush that she can _hear._

“Good girl— good girl— gon—na” his speech comes out in raged bursts against her neck, his knot getting thicker as he continues to rut up into her, “gonna give you my knot— Gonna put— nnngh put a baby in you— you wa—nt that?”

Words come as a foreign concept as she nods because yes, _fuck yes_ she wants that, she wants that more than anything else. Resting her head against his shoulder, “please, please,” softly uttered against his skin as she mouths his neck, her lips finding his gland. 

The sound that rips through him is wild and raw as he holds her still against him and his teeth sink into the muscle of her shoulder. The sudden stretch of his knot fills her and she was wrong before because this is what she has been missing. His arms wrapped possessively around her, rocking slowly as his cock pulses spilling heavily into her. It happens in bursts, like the steady thumping of a heartbeat, his knot locking them together trapping his cum inside. It’s only then that the burning in her veins subsides, her belly swollen and full as each shift of her hips milks more, and more, and _more_ until it’s leaking out the edges. A mix of her and him trickling down over his balls making him sticky and wet. 

With a laboured grunt Ben turns finding her safely to the bed, cradling her body close. Gone are the filthy words, in their place a soft hushing praise. More ‘ _pretty girl_ ’ and ‘ _sweet girl’_ as he runs his fingers through her hair and kisses her nose. “I’ve thought about you so much,” he tells her quietly, his lips at her ear, “It nearly killed me when you presented.” 

The rational part of her brain struggles to keep up, snuggling close her cheek nuzzling against his chest. He is heat and safety but still, he manages to find dry sheets pulling them around them until they’re secured within a cocoon of warm and soft and squishy things. 

“You treated me differently after that,” she says with no real malice. 

“You smelled so good but you were so young and Cassian would have killed me.” barreling through the truth Ben sighs, “I wanted you so bad Rey, so so bad and then I didn’t think I could ever… that this was ever…” His scent shifts and swirls around her, the soft peak of his anxiety more a ripple in a pond than a wave.

Still, Rey wraps herself around him squeezing him with her thighs, in an attempt to soften his concern. “It’s ok.” she hums but Ben is lost in his thoughts now. She can hear the way his mind tumbles as reality becomes a real and tangible thing existing around them. The clock on the wall ticking, the breeze from the world outside toying with her drapes. Suddenly it’s not just her and him anymore but the world at large happening around them.

They rest for some time, Ben’s knot eventually softening enough for him to pull out. Their thighs tacky and still damp as Ben slowly strokes a finger down her spine. Neither moves though they’re now able. Even soft she manages to keep him inside, though the mess he’s painted her cervix with is slowly seeping out. 

Rey’s mind trips over consciousness carelessly, her mind drifting in and out, lost in the way that Ben’s hands move. After a while, he starts asking her questions, silly things at first, inconsequential, favourite coffee shop in the area, if she still enjoys Harry Potter. It’s obvious he’s scrambling for small pieces of her life, scraps of who she is now. No longer the little girl he used to tease for being able to eat a whole six tacos in one sitting (she still can thank you very much). Now she’s a woman with a story and a life, ten years' worth of history that she knows he’s working up the courage to ask about. 

Normally she hates the questions when they come. Where Rian’s father is now, how it happened, how she feels about it all but when Ben asks she finds she doesn’t mind so much. She tells him her story, her need for a choice, her fear of being attached to an Alpha. She had loved Owen that was never in question but despite the nature of his job he was safe. She never worried about losing herself in him the way she sometimes feared when she was younger. With biology out of the picture, she was free. Sure it had been hard, but life was hard and that’s just how things went.

Rey had never really understood the depth of what it was she was missing.

Rian was healthy, sure she’d had to sell the house but they have a roof over their heads and she’s making new friends. She has a job and Maz, who as it turns out is very close with Ben’s father Han. 

They talk about Ben’s career and how he hates his boss but loves the work. How he never found anyone who smelled quite right to him before. He’d dated a few Beta’s but his job kept him pretty busy. He laughs about how his mother harasses him for grandchildren and then blushes when he apologizes for his filthy mouth warning her it will, in all likelihood happen again. They don’t talk about the mating glad though, the one that itches even now as Ben’s fingers smooth over its edges. Rey thinks about it thought. It’s the first time she’s ever really thought about it honestly. What it would mean, how it might happen. It seems a dangerous thing, such a small piece of flesh so easily punctured under the wrong circumstances.

How many people get bitten accidentally? 

She’d begged, pleaded, and moaned for it and Ben, thank god had restrained himself. Could they guarantee that it wouldn’t happen the next time. The mark on her shoulder where his teeth sunk in is still tender but deliciously so. And what would it mean to be mated?

Would she be trapped in a relationship, the lower half of a whole?

No, Ben wouldn’t do that. She doesn’t think so at least but does she even know him anymore? 

T en years is a long time and still, he feels like home. His scent like rich chocolate dusted with cinnamon, the kind he used to make her she realizes with a sudden dose of clarity. He was the one who would bring her cups filled with cocoa when he’d find out she’d had a bad day. Cassian would tease Ben and tell him she was just being a girl but Ben never listened. He always showed up at her door when she didn’t seek him out, a soft knock and a warm mug as he leaned against the framework. He’d never come into her room, always lingering on the edges of being too personal. 

They fuck three more times before sleep finally pulls her under. Once against the kitchen table after Ben feeds her slices of apple, another time in the shower as he consoled her wild rage over washing his scent away. The third time is after a short nap, she wakes up with his cock sliding between her legs as Ben paws at her breast. He takes her slow and easy, mouthing her neck and telling her how perfect she is. When she comes undone it’s not the messy show of their precious couplings but something soft and breathtaking. A whimper with his hand on her throat, her head thrown back against his shoulder. Ben follows sometime after, his thrust slow and easy as he takes his time, savouring every last moment he can. 

They don’t talk about what this means for them or if they’ll see each other again. It’s too hard to bring it up and truthfully she’s not sure she wants to know the answer. Still, she begs for his teeth. Loud and needy she cries for it, grateful every time it’s over that Ben has managed to find the willpower to abstain. 

“You’re playing with fire.” He mutters into her hair, her eyes heavy with sleep as he licks one of the many bite marks that grace her shoulders and back.

Her answer is no more than a soft hum as she drifts off savouring the way his cock feels locking him inside her. 

When she wakes it’s to the smell of hot chocolate and something deliciously sweet cooking. Her nose twitching curiously when she realizes it’s not Ben but actual food she’s smelling. He’s gone from her side, the bed still a little warm despite his absence. The ache in her body is more muscle then heat-related making her wonder if this random heat wasn’t more a breakthrough issue then a real heat. Normally at this point, she would be pouring bottles of water over her body in an attempt to keep herself cool, her brain a sodden mess, too thick with a hormonal haze to rationalize what a shower is for. 

Grabbing Ben’s white button-down off the floor she pulls it on over her shoulders pressing the soft fabric against her face. They’re in her home, her housecoat hanging on the back of her door, her clothes strewn everywhere and still his shirt calls to her. The cuffs hang down over her fingers making her look like a child playing dress-up, the material fluttering against her thighs. 

She finds him in the kitchen just a few feet from her bedroom door, standing in front of the old stove that only seems to work when _it_ wants to. She’s pretty sure it’s older then she is with a burner that tends to go crazy and boil over no matter what setting it’s on. The long and short of it the damn stove is possessed. 

“You hungry?” Ben chimes without turning around giving her a rather pleasant view of his back. Broad and muscled and covered in little scratch marks. Did she do that?

“Mmmm,” she hums drifting into the room, “Starving.” 

His chuckle is soft and warm as he glances over her shoulder carefully, “I made you cocoa,” With a spatula, he points to the counter by the sink where a mug of hot chocolate sits waiting. A thin layer of melted marshmallow floating on the surface smattered with a sprinkling of….

“Cinnamon…” 

“Yeah, sorry, force of habit I suppose.” 

No, she wants to tell him that it’s perfect, her hands cradling the warm cup in her hands as she allows the steam to waft over her face. Chocolate, and cinnamon, a scent that has never meant more to her then it does in this moment, “It’s you,” she mutters into the rim, taking a slow and easy sip. It’s hot, almost too hot to drink stinging her tongue as it fills her mouth. It’s like a warm hug, like Ben’s arms wrapped around her pulling her close. 

Busy flipping what Rey now realizes is a pancake Ben chuckles again, “What did you say?” 

It comes out in a rush, tears and laughter garbled together in a mess of emotion. Quickly she’s setting the cup down barely catching the edge of the counter before throwing herself forward. Her chest hits his back pushing him forward dangerous. Thank god for his thick and steady thighs. Thighs bare but for the black boxer briefs, he decided to pull on. “It’s you,” she says it again, pressing her nose into his shoulder as she inhales deeply. “It’s what you smell like.” 

“I smell like chocolate?” Lifting up his arm he peers under searching for her, trying to turn around but she holds him in place.

“Not just chocolate but hot cocoa and cinnamon,” she offers him dreamily her hands curling around his chest to hold him still. He’s so much bigger then he had been then, no longer the skinny kid with the goofy smile, “You didn’t even like hot chocolate.” 

“But you did.” His muscles shift beneath his skin as he moves to flip another pancake onto an already cooked stack as he reaches out to turn off the burner. “You didn’t have much but there was pancake mix. Sorry, it’s not something better.” Trying to turn again he uses his considerable size to his advantage wrapping her tightly within his arms. Lips against her forehead feel sweet as his thighs bump against her belly. A belly, she remembers with a flush to her cheeks then Ben had been adamant on filling with his children. It still feels a little swollen, not sore but a pressure that she’s become very aware of. Wondering now what it might be like if maybe things had been different for them. 

Rian wouldn’t exist and that isn’t something she can accept but maybe, just maybe they’re being given an opportunity here, “Your son said I smelled like chocolate too…” Ben muses softly, his cheek pressed against her hair as he rocks them softly. It's the steady shifting of hips, so very close to how he had rocked Rian just the day previous. 

“Yeah, he did.” What more can she say? So much and too much and it’s all so strange…

“Think it means something?” it’s said so softly she’s not even sure she’s heard him correctly, “I mean… that I smell the same to him?”

Rey swallows unsure how to answer. There’s logic and then there’s hope in the absence of fear. For just a moment she leans into it, the idea that if she falls he’ll be the one to catch her and it’s nice. Because this thing, this feeling she knows it's more than just biology, a mess of hormones and heat. It's the heart of a man who despite all odds she's managed to find again. Maybe a coincidence, sure but maybe that's all life really is...

“I hope so.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE END
> 
> CW it's in the tags but there's mentions of baby-making here and biology which I kind of geek out over 
> 
> Thanks for reading everyone. Now I'll go back to pretending to work on my WIPs... I mean...   
> Come say Hi on [The Twitter!](https://twitter.com/rebelscumreylo)


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